Featured in 2015 Spring Issue of Rambunctious

By Emily Hauser, ’15

Fear is when you walk in the front door after you just got a speeding ticket. The feeling you get when you step into the doors of the high school on your first day of freshman year. The feeling of skidding on ice that is beneath your tires on a snowy day, and almost losing control of your car. It is the way you panic when you look at the clock and realize you only have twenty minutes to get ready. It is the loud noise you hear when you’re home alone, so you lock yourself into your room. It’s the screaming you hear from your parents, who are fighting over God knows what. It’s the way he tells you, “There’s something we need to talk about.” It’s the feeling of being in a room and wondering when that certain person will walk through those doors. It’s the way you slip your foot into muddy cleats, minutes before your playoff game. Maybe it’s when you realize you’re leaving for college in less than a year, and you will be completely on your own. It is the feeling when you look at your phone and realize you have missed calls from your mom. It’s sneaking out of your back door at 12:30 at night and coming back at 3:00 in the morning. It is getting ready for your first date since your big break up. Maybe fear is going out on a limb, telling him you’re tired of the way he’s treating you. The feeling is like a long wait in the waiting room of a hospital, just sitting there until your name is called. The doctor telling you need a current shot, is fear. The sudden feeling you get when you quickly realize you can’t trust anyone at anytime, and everyone you love will at some point be gone. It is the feeling you get after you’ve done something so bad, and you know that in a matter of time, you’ll be in a lot more trouble than before. It’s taking that small plane to El Salvador, despite your fear of heights, or fear of another country. Fear is all so personal. Fear is excitement. Fear is adrenaline.